Does given nicknames define us as people? 6 things to take back your given power...
- NikkiSmiles
- Aug 11, 2019
- 2 min read
Let's get personal we all seem to have nicknames given to us at one point or another.
But why!?
I was approximately 7 years of age when my nickname was first given. A friend of the family first said this to me one hot sticky summer; out hunting slugs and grasshoppers in the streets. The best of times. SMILES. At the time what seemed like an innocent nickname to dub an awkward giggly girl; he was handsome, seemed fitting, and it STUCK.
Being a very insecure youngster I very quickly learned to hide behind smiles and laughs, because that's happy, yes!? SMILES, soon became a dark mask of misunderstanding. A dark cloud that followed me around for the greater part of a decade. The reason no one ever asked.
ENTER high school,. SMILES, there she is again this nickname forever bearing weight down on me to be a "happy" "cheerful" "girl" UGH
UGH, HOW DID SHE FIND ME?
The first clue that something was a miss!
SO, seven years later, again, friends happily dubbed me SMILES and I happily complied. Enter many nights of turning it over in my head. All the ins and outs of this nickname and the power it had taken on for me. How had it gained so much power over dictating how I felt about myself?! Defining my character. People said " you're always so happy and smiley" but I didn't feel like that girl...I really wanted too..
Answer, I still don't know.
It has been the source of much self searching, meant many things. In the end, it has shifted and grown with me.
IT IS MY SECRET POWER!
BUT, What I do know and what I've learned ...
I am not words, I am not anything someone assigns to me. I choose what words I give power too, and their meaning.
Accept responsibility for how you feel. Don't let other people's behavior dictate your emotions.
Don't waste energy complaining, establish healthy boundaries. Recognizing you are in charge of yourself, thoughts and actions. Mindfulness helps
Practice forgiveness, especially for yourself. When you waste valuable time thinking about your wrongs you waste valuable energy on the things that are right!
Be the driver of your own life, don't become a helpless passenger. When you are unsure of yourself other peoples ideas will surely and easily lead you astray. Know your values.
Don't waste time on unproductive thoughts. Make your self-worth independent of other peoples opinions. Take back your POWER. You are not a victim. Not everyone will like you. Thats OK. Acknowledging you have choices and there will certainly be consequences for the deciosns you make. Evaluate the merit of cristism you are receiving, but never allow any one persons opinion (even your own) to determine your self worth. We are not the words we tell ourselves. XO, N
Wall Street Journal Best Seller
Reference Source: AmyMorinLCSW.com
Comentarios